101 Uses for a Vac-Suit +5

Quite a while ago a bunch of Artifact players were remarking on a piece of equipment in the game called a Vac-Suit. Most characters get one to start the game, but nobody used them as intended (they’re limited use space/hazard suits). In fact a few of them had no idea what they even were supposed to do. People were using them for all kinds of things except for wearing them so we started a list of 101 uses for a Vac-Suit and ended up with 106.  It’s a bit hair brained but it was fun to come up with the list. Enjoy!

1. Fill with LCF, dumped out the back of a freighter and shot at a distance so it would explode.
2. Fill with air and anchored with rocks in the feet. Used as a decoy of a person standing there.
3. Fill with air and used as a floatation device in the sewers.
4. Used to safely store pelin.
6. You can barter it for something small (everybody has them, no-one seems to want them.)
7. Use it to poison/suffocate someone when they put it on. (who puts them on though?)
8. Fill it with lighter than air gas and use it as a balloon to lift small objects.
9. Fill it with water.( is anyone issued a canteen that will actually last as long as a game?)
10. Keep your leftovers fresh! (hey it’s airtight isn’t it?)
11. Fill vac-suit with all your loot.
12. Wrap a part of it around someone’s head and suffocate them, hey it worked with a garbage bag on a Pettok.
13. Twist them up and tie them together to make a rope.
14. Write on it with a marker to leave a note.
15. Put water and soap inside to use as a washing machine!
16. Stretch it over a large bowl or tub to make a drum.
17. Draw a face on it, put it on a poll and use it to represent someone as us burn it in effigy.
18. Use it as a dew collector for drinking water by stretching it over a frame and stand it in a windy area between hexes. (Wind underground means temp differences, temp differences mean condensation, if you’re lucky.)
19. Hold it over your head during a rain cycle to stay dry.
20. Large garbage bag. Don’t be a litter bug! Then again, we leave carnage everywhere…..
21. Stretch across a small frame of some sort as a glider. You’d have to use more than one, especially if you’re wearing clothes or carrying anything. Use everybody’s together. Send a small scimrahn NPC.
22. Cut up to make boots. Don’t our boots ever wear out? We use them to set off traps, who replaces them? Is there a traveling Scimrahn shoe tradesman? Vac-suit boots….mmmmm.
23. Cut off the feet and stretch them over your shoes/boots for galoshes.
24. Spread it and a little dirt over your pit trap to hide it.
25. Cut smaller into lingerie.
26. Thread leaves, branches etc. to suit and wear as camouflage in Agricultural Hex.
27. Cut off pieces to use as little bags to tuck into belts (the way Romans carried money)
28. Keep biological pathogens off you or keep yours to yourself.
29. Replace or cover Holes in your Windshield/windows.
30. Use them as a drop cloth to keep paint/water/dust off your things.
31. Use as a vacuum bag (that is if you have a vacuum) to store clothing in a confined place.
32. Use it as a piggy bank to keep all your loose change.
33. Use it to squish bugs without getting bug guts on you.
34. Inflate one to use as a scare crow to keep Bah-bahreeth from eating all the Zah.
35. Use it for a table cloth.
36. Use it as a duffle bag or compression sack, or for storing stinky laundry.
37. Use to keep moisture sensitive things dry, like ammo or electronics.
38. Fill it with water and import some fish for an Aquarium.
39. Use it as a pin cushion so you don’t loose your pins and needles.
40. Shovel dirt onto it and then pick up the arms and legs to carry the dirt.
41. Use the same method to clean up after your Pettok’s droppings.
42. Burn several of them to create a smoke screen.
43. Use the suit as a tourniquet in first aid.
44. Keep your guns from corroding and from abrasion by keeping them inside. (improvised gun sock)
45. Use the liquid Oxy to help start a fire.
46. Cut it into strips and use it as a sling for an injured arm.
47. One could twist the suit and then leave a flat spot in the material, and use it like a sling
48. Tie the arms around your neck, and wear it as a cape.
49. Place vac suit on your back by tying arms to legs ACROSS your chest…. place rescued baby in it on your back to transport baby around Artifact to nearest Scimrahn village. Deposit baby.
50. Cut smaller and use as odor-free diaper.
51. Stretch across small frame as a mini trampoline to amuse yourself. +5 to Psyche.
52. Place Zah in vac-suit, add some Chigs. Make enemy wear it to sloooowly torture information out of him/her.
53. Fill with water and poke holes in it to daily irrigate your garden. Eat the fish.
54. Unzip the suit (um… well whatever system thats like a zipper that opens and closes the suit). Put stuff in it. Place vac suit on your back by tying arms to legs into loops and slip them over your arms and you have a backpack!
55. Have one person grab a leg or arm and have someone stand on it ready to jump, everybody lifts and moves apart launching the jumper into the air!
56. Engineer: instruct all to wear vac-suits (yes, wear them). Collect Pelin and spread strategically where enemy is approaching. Wait for it….. wait for it…. ignite! Attack all unaffected enemy first, then finish off those that inhaled the toxic fumes. Mwahahaha!
57. Allow oxygen frrom the tank into the suit, go off a distance and shoot it for a distraction to enemies.
58. Use tank in mele combat to whack the bejeepers out of someone (knock them unconscious). NOTE: This is just an empty tank.
59. From above, drop empty tank on someone. The higher up, the worse damage (IF you roll and actually hit them )
60. Shake it and break the valve off to spray the liquid at your opponent. (con or psy roll or stunned for 1D6 turns)
61. Shake it and break the valve off to spray the liquid at your opponent. and light it as it sprays out. (5 pts + 1pts per turn until extinguished)
62. Wear it over your cloths and wade into water/sewers.
63. Wear the suit for a short use scuba.
64. Wear the suit if fumes or smoke are making breathing difficult.
65. Since oxygen is used to make people feel better in hospitals and they give it to distance runners after a race. . . Breath the oxygen straight from the breather when tired (+5 to Con)
66. Soak pieces of absorbant cloth in the liquid from the tank, tie them around the collector attached to the suit, light it, and swing the collector around using the suit and launch it into the air for a makeshift signal flare.
67. we put some one in it, with out thier arms in the sleeves, we could then use it as a straight jacket.
68. Poke a bunch of holes in it, pour your cooked pasta in from the pan and you have a colander!
69. Put on the Vac-suit. Pressurize the suit to inflate it and then put heavy cloths over it. This will keep you warmer than just the warm cloths alone since there is a layer of air insulating you from the outside air.
70. Poke holes in the suit and stick pipes in the holes. With a lot of adjustments and drilling holes in the pipes, you just might get a functional bagpipe!
71. Poke two holes in the suit one hole at one end, then glue two flat boards to the suit and a one way valve to the other hole preferably through one of the boards and you have a bellows.
72. Hook up al kinds of hoses at points all over the suit, except the head, set up a water pump with heater, climb in, fill with water= portable hot tub(sorry one person only)
73. Put the suit on, Fill it with water and exercise with the added weight on you.
74. Fill with helium and give out as balloons at the local fair.
75. Sew a lot together and make a hot air balloon.
76. “Acquire” enemy uniform, put over vacsuit, leave at a distance for disguised decoy.
77. Put a Seeter in it, trim their claws, tie their mouths shut, and let them run around inside for entertainment. Cruelty to animals. No good/noble for us!
78. Fill it with your cloths, draw a face on it and then take it dancing to avoid going crazy when alone for months on end. (You can’t go crazy if you act like you are.) If you want to name it Wilson, that’s up to you.
79. Wear the suit to protect yourself from White Spoor. (Only good for one hour of protection from first contact.)
80. Turn it inside out and pick up some white spore and contain it for one hour to infect/contaminate someone/thing?
81. twist strips of the vac-suit into ropes, then twist the ropes together to make a scaled down “roman catapult” style weapon with some additional pieces of CCC.
82. Tie between two freighters for a clothesline
83. Tie between two freighters for a person hammock. Ahhhh This is the life
84. stretch and hold flat off ground to catch small children that are falling from a ceiling full of little freaky robots….
85. While foraging for food, tie each arm to a leg, and slip over your shoulders and use it as a bucket to hold all your berries/nuts/insects.
86. Get everyone in unit to fill three-quarters full of water, put together in an even pile, TaDAA, water-bed!
87. wrap a delicate item loosely in a vac-suit, put in a box and then inflate the suit to protect the item from impact.
88. Fill 30 of them with air and drop off any 3-5 meter overhang, then jump into the pile and hopefully they’ll break your fall.
89. Tie a rope around the suit and then fill with water. Attach the rope to a sturdy overhead surface and bring the suit up to the ceiling with the rope stretched tight. When someone walks by, let it swing! Good for funnin’ or stunnin’.
90. Alway’s wear your Vac-Suit and complain about germs or bugs to everyone so they think you’re crazy. Why? I don’t know. Maybe just for social engineering.
91. Fill a company’s worth of vac-suits (128) with helium (or hydrogen) and tie them all together, or hold them together with a net of some kind and use it to lift yourself into the air. Just don’t Hindenburg it.
92. Lay vac-suit on ground, put a layer of dirt, plants and creepy crawleys into the thing, put pressure in the suit, and wal-laa! it’s a terrarium!
93. Put hazardous materials in the suit, inflate it, turn the hands inside out and you have an isolation station.
94. Put on the suit and chop onions. No more tears!
95. Wear the suit when you have to change a baby’s diaper/take out the garbage.
96. Shove one under a wobbling table leg.
97. Cut off a finger (of the suit) and use it as a bookmark.
98. Attach to the front of your vehicle as a bug shield (so you don’t get bug guts all over your paint job).
99. Cut it up and make a dustcover for you book/laptop
100. Stuff in drafty cracks in you tent/house
101. cut into strips and use for shoelaces.
102. cut a strip out and use it to tie up your hair.
103. Give it as a gift (you cheapskate).
104. Use it as a bib
105. Wrap one around your broken U joint to get back to base.
106. Use as an emergency tie down.


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